Got Copy Craves?
Let us Satiate.


Below is a sampling of our services but if you don’t see EXACTLY what you need — give us a call and we’ll figure it out!
We tend to build long term relationships with our clients and can come up with multi-phase content and sales copy plans.
The Email 6-Pack
Ready to lean back, crack open a cold one, and watch the income come rolling in?
Then let us help you write a compelling and selling (that’s grammar, right?) email sequence!
You can use these emails as a welcome sequence, sales sequence, nurture sequence, or whatever you fancy.
🌟 We helped a local, family-owned antique jewelry business increase their sales by 41% — through the pandemic. They made 5-figures off ONE email alone!
🌟 A business coach used our emails for a 6-figure launch off a $49/month membership with ZERO paid advertising!
🌟 Our emails helped an Etsy coach actually GROW her audience after a hefty COVID slump.
Here’s what’s included:
PenguinCat Questionnaire — This is our intro to YOU!
Creative + Strategy Sesh — Let’s create a customer journey that sings and sells!
6 Emails + Multiple Subject Lines — Sell your services, warm up your audience, and get your message in the hands of those who need it most!
The Email 6 Pack
$1250
The Scroll-Stopping Ads Package
It won’t matter how beautiful your photos or accurate your targeting or how much budget you throw at Zuck — if your messaging isn’t ON POINT, your Facebook and Instagram ads won’t convert.
#sorrynotsorry those are just the facts…
Our team writes nearly 300 Facebook/Instagram ads every month, so we know a thing or two about connecting with the RIGHT audience to keep costs low and conversions high.
To date, we’ve worked on over 1500+ funnels and helped bring in over $110M in revenue for our clients.
While we can never make ROI promises — there are just WAY too many factors — we consistently average 4x returns for our clients and have had ROI on our ads as high as 8744%!
We also have connections to some of the BEST Facebook ad agencies and ad managers in the whole world and would be happy to make introductions!
Here’s what’s included:
PenguinCat Questionnaire — Help us get to know you!
Creative + Strategy Sesh — We’ll deep dive into your ideal client, voice, and funnel strategy!
10 Scroll-Stopping Ads — Stop your ideal client in their tracks and get them to throw their credit card at their computer!
Various Headlines to Test — Marketing is all about experimentation. We’ll give you plenty of options to test your heart out!
Opt-in Audit —If your opt-in does not match your ads OR isn’t Facebook compliant, you’ll run into conversion issues. Let us audit your page and make suggestions for creative AND compliance!
*We can also write ads for LinkedIn!
The Scroll-Stopping Ads Package
$1250
The Sensational Sales Page
If you need a sales page that doesn’t just follow a template but creatively and authentically CREATES a conversation with your client — we got you covered!
Our sales pages have increased conversions for our clients by up to 790% — trust us, those results don’t happen with bro-marketing tricks and slimy sales hacks.
We write copy that resonates deeply with your audience and entertains them along the way — so they feel heard, held, and oh-so-ready to buy.
Here’s what’s included:
PenguinCat Questionnaire — So we can get to know you and your brand!
Creative + Strategy Sesh — Let’s dive deep into your voice, messaging, and ideal client!
Sales Page — Your magical, highly profitable, creative AF page delivered straight to your inbox!
Thank You Page — Your clients will feel your gratitude and be clear on the next steps!
Confirmation Email — Deliver your product, service, or course with style!
The Sensational Sales Page
$3500
Ready. Set. Launch.
Eager to take over the world, but not sure how to make it happen? Pish-Posh. You’ve got this.
Love at First “Site”
Groan all you want. Yes, that pun was intended. You only have a few precious seconds to grab hold.
Packages start at $1250
Let’s create a custom bundle! (mmm, cozy…)
A La Carte Offerings
Minimum Investment of $1250
Website copy (any pages you need!)
Sales Pages
Opt-in Pages
Landing Pages
Facebook Ads (Minimum 3 Campaigns)
Instagram Ads (Minimum 3 Campaigns)
Custom Email Funnels
Facebook Bot Ads
Webinar Scripts/Slides
YouTube Content Ideation/Scripts
No One Ignores the PenguinCat

